A freind wrote on Facebook today. He said that we need to not forget that our parents were people before they met us. That they had lives before we came along. I have been feeling that too lately. That, as a parent, I have put my children and their needs and their hopes and dreams first. Seriously though, a little selfish part of me sometimes eeks out and a tiny voice says:" What about me?" There are times that I feel bad about that little voice, that it doesn't belong in the world that I have carved out with my husband and my family. Most times it doesn't eek out, most times, I don't do anything for just me, aside from an occasional book from the library, or a lazy day. When I do those little things, I feel good, they don't cost a lot, they take a little time for me, and I get a little reward for me. I am not one of those people who need to run out and spend a ton of money on clothing that I won't wear all of the time. I don't need an expensive pocketbook, or tons of electronic devices. I just need to pay the bills and enjoy the little things.
And yet, that little voice says its piece every so often. I sometimes remember that once in my life, I was only concerned with myself. That seems like more than a hundred years ago. I am fine with it all, knowing that I gave up being selfish and traded it for being selfless. Not a bad trade off. I find things that I do rewarding and enjoy the small rewards. SO, do I regret that I don't have more stuff? NOPE. Do I want more stuff? NOPE. My hopes rest with my children. I want them to realize their dreams, no matter what they are. No matter how big, or how small. They are my proudest accomplishment, they are most important in my world right now. WHen they go out on their won, they will be less in the forefront of my world, and perhaps I can be a little more selfish. That is what will and should happen.
But still, the children and the life that I have with my husband will be my proudest accomplishments.
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3 comments:
Great Post. Every once in awhile I get to thinking about the things Char and I did without for the kids and there was a lot. It always ends the same way - we would do it all over again. Char and I also reminded ourselves that one day the kids would be gone and it would just be us so we needed to make time for each other. We did.
Ralph
Ralph, I know what you mean. We give up a part of ourselves, but we get so much more back. Scott and i try to take a little time here and there for us, even if it is just a cup of coffee at a Dunkin' Donuts.....a ride in the car without the kids and such. Life soemtimes gets away from us, but the small times we spend together is important.
Yep, once the kids are gone you will find that you will be able to spend a little more on the both of you. That is, until the grand babies come along...
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