This was written for a memory book, compiled for my in-laws, for their suprise 40th anniversary party, which my husband, myself, my brother-in-law and his wife threw this past Saturday night, I just wanted the world to know what I think of them, and where my husband comes from, a good place:
Memories are hard to write down, so please bear with me. I know that I am one of the luckiest women around, I have "good" in-laws. I used to sit and listen to the women at lunchtime, when I was a working girl, and they would tell horror stories of their Mother-in Law, or both of their in-laws. I would sit back and not be able to join in the "fun." I would be asked, "Don't you have anything to add to this, you are newly married, to a family of only boys?" My response would be, " Nope, I happen to like my in-laws, they are good to me."
I have never been a "beauty queen," but I was accepted into their family, as part of the family. From the get go, I didn't feel as if I were an intruder. I was invited over for Sunday Dinner, after work. I was invited for Christmas eve at Grandma T's house. We would watch Tv with "the parents," instead of going out during the week.
When the time came that we were engaged, I was lovingly accepted and welcomed. I became a "daughter," not just a daughter in -law. In fact, I picked my bridal gown from the very first bride magazine that I got, and guess who gave it to me!
My children came, and my in-laws were there for the births of all three. Dad has the video to prove it.
The joy on their faces when they watched the boys grow was inconceivable. When Cassidy was born, it wasn't just joy, it was rapture! A little girl, a little girl, something none of us was familiar with, but soon, she made her position as the "queen" known! I have never seen my father in-law act silly, but if Cassidy asks, he will! She has power!
That is the magic of being family. Being loved, being accepted, not for what you can produce, or what you can be, but on the merrits of you. I honestly have a gift, given from the heart, that cannot be returned to any store, but is returned with gratitude,love, and respect, everyday of my life. I know that I live in a world where people are still kind, people are still generous, in spirit, not just in material, and where people just: LOVE!
Happy 40th Anniversary, thank you for setting the best example for me to follow,
Love,
Miki
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9 comments:
Oh, Miki, this is just wonderful! Your writing brought tears to my eyes. You are sooo lucky/blessed to have such nice in-laws. Mine are a nightmare. But, I figure I have 2 chances at this DIL & MIL relationship. #1 with me as the DIL, and #2 is with me as the MIL to my ds's (who's 3) future wife. I plan to make the most of my second chance. I've learned, through my MIL, how NOT to be a MIL! I will do better! :)
My mother in law has always been kind and loving to me, when my husband and I went thru a pretty rough time, she listened and talked and didn't judge, she was just there. My experience with my own mother isn't like this-I could never tell my mother what was happening, I would tell her that everything is fine, was fine, and etc. Don't get me wrong, my husband is a very loving man, bu tlacks in the emotional support line, it is just where he is, and Ihave accepted that, so I look to the good, and not to the parts that are lacking. His dad is a little foreboding, to say the least, but he grew on me, and was also there and is there when we need him. He is emotionally open with my kids, but never was with his own kids, so that is the trade off. He shows his sons that he loves them by helping them with their household projects, fixing stuff, you know, he doesn't say the words. I actually think that my husband is a little afraid of his Dad still. I just know that I can look at my mother inlaw and know that I want to be one like her, and whatever my sons' choices, I will accept and welcome them into the family. My daughter, who is now 4, I don't even want to think about it! But that too will be okay!
Miki
Ps Do you know where Pasadena MD is? We will be playing there over Labor Day Weekend.
Miki -- I love your insight on the whole in-law situation...
I have never been to Pasadena myself, but I believe it is about 45 mins from where I live. How long will it take you to get there? Wow -- I'd imagine it's quite a drive!
MMMMM......I think it is about a 4 hour drive, believe it or not. I mean if we went to "Ripken" it would be a 3 1/2 hour drive to Aberdeen, so I am assuming more to Pasedena. It took us 5 1/2 hours with stops to get to Rehoboth DE, so............
Wow! Is that all? Are you on Long Island somewhere? I would have thought more like seven hours, but that tells ya how many times I've been to/on Long Island.....none! LOL
Anyway, that's great! Does your ds only have one game in Pasadena? 4 hours still seems like quite a hike. lol
Out of curiosity, how long to Williamsport? (you do mean Williamsport PA, don't you?) :)
we are smack dab in the middle of "the Island" I hope that it doesn't take 7 hours, 5 was too long in the car with 3 kids, and trust me, our car isn't that big, it was packed to th egills and had 5 people in it to get to DE and PA! but, the fun was worth the trip. I totally enjoyed myself, the kids had a ball, and the "older" siblings all got along and had fun with each other.
I have to learn to upload or download pictures, that will be my next step on this blog, that way you can see the kids.
what is your blog? I would like to read some of your stuff!?
LOL! I don't write -- just read. :)
Did you spend a week in Rehoboth? I haven't been there in ages! I grew up just west of Philly and used to frequent Rehoboth, etc! ...Fun times! :) These days we go to the OBX, which takes between 7 and 9 hours, depending on traffic on 95. It's grueling, but worth it when we get there...
I certainly hope it doesn't take you 7 hours too! ;) If Aberdeen was 3.5 hrs, you're probably right about Pasadena.
We were in Reading PA for the fourth of July. Daniel had a tournament, 2 games on Saturday, 2 games and a playoff on Sunday, and two playoffs on Monday. We didn't leave until almost 6pm on Monday, but traffic was relatively light, the folks who stayed the extra night and went home on tues, they hit traffic.
We spent the Memorial day weekend in Rehoboth, would have liked to spend more time there, it kind of reminded me of the Jersey shore, with the arcades and candy shops and stuff on the boardwoalk. We are going back there in October for a weekend tournament, hopefully will stay in a less expensive hotel and will enjoy the area a little more, and get to know our way around a little. We played ball at a complex about 15 miles west of the Beach, and it was called SPORTS AT THE BEACH. Nice complex, and relatively new.
As for MD, we are going on Labor Day Weekend, travel on friday, home on Monday. I don't know the game schedule yet, we usually don't know until the thrusday before the tournament. Hopefully these folks will be as nice as the rest have been, they will take into consideration that we are from way out of state and play us all day saturday and no games on sunday. It will be fun, as the venue gets closer, I will fill you in!
We didn't actually go to Williamsport PA, it was a team that played in our district to get the opportunity to go to williamsport. Hence the name Williamsport tournament team, we lost our 2nd game, so that is why we were eliminated, but to tell you the truth, it was ok for that to happen, with everything else going on!
You should write, you do it well in the comments, and what ever you write will be great, even if it is the thoughts and ramblings of a mom with a three year old.
I was an English Major in another life, and would have enjoyed being a journalist, but......life just turned and I had a teaching certificate, but let that one go too, I had to contribute to the household with a "normal" salary, and then kids came and etc.....so I stay at home now and it isn't too bad. anyhow, will probably write an entry about my crazy life someday!
Wow --Miki, that (above) was a blog entry in and of itself, hey?!
And gee, thanks for the vote of confidence in the writing department! :) Honestly, I enjoy writing, but really don't have enough time, nor (at this point) the interest or know-how in maintaining a blog of my own...
Thanks for the info -- I had no idea how all these tounaments/OOT games work. My kiddos are only 3 & 5 and I ran Cross Country in HS. I was not very good at competitive sports like soft/baseball, lacrosse etc... just put me in a big field and I could out-run 'em all!! LOL :)
A-ha -- especially interesting about the Williamport tournament! I've always loved to watch those LL games in Williamsport on the tv, and last August, on our way to camping in upstate NY (and visiting my brother at CMOG) we drove right through the middle of Williamport on a game day! LOL the traffic was a nightmare and there were Little Leaguers everywhere! LOL bad timing!! :)
I'm a SAHM too, and love it. Wouldn't have it any other way. I have my degee in Social Work with a specialty in gerenology, and a minor in Elementary Education. Before my kiddos, I did SW with kids in high-risk elementary schools. When my kids arrived, all that flew out the window.
Anyway, I love reading your blog! Thanks for writing and keep up the great work!!! ;)
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